Better day.... sort of

Well, I survived Friday. The weekend hasn't been great, but I did get to scrapbook ALL day yesterday. Had a crop at my church - it was so much fun and very productive for me which is unusual for me when I'm scrapping somewhere other than my house.
This morning while trying to take the vacuum cleaner downstairs before church, I got a little tangled in the cord and down I went. Hurt some, but guess could've been worse. I managed to make it to church. I do pretty well if I don't bend over and don't sit. haha. Well sitting is ok once I get there for a minute. Anyway, all the hoopla around the household has calmed down for now. But with 5 kids its only a matter of time. Gotta love em.
Went to my Beth Moore Esther class tonight. I'm just loving it and with only 3 more lessons I am finding myself not wanting it to end. Tonights lesson had a lot to do with Turning Around. Boy, do I need to do that! So much to take care of within myself and I struggle so with it.
Anyway...... I'm looking forward to a much better week.

Waiting.......

I've been doing a study on Esther and boy has it been interesting. I actually knew very little about Esther before the study, but I am loving it. I am learning so much and this week it has been about waiting. Waiting for the right time, God's time. That is something I have a hard time with sometimes. I don't think I'm that much different than most people. Its hard to wait, much less wait on Gods time. We all know that He knows best in all things, but it is hard.
The culture we live in is training us to be impatient. Everything has to be instant, fast. We get irritated if traffic is moving too slow, if it takes 5 minutes to get our "fast food", if we are kept on hold for more than 10 seconds. Its truly a shame, because "TIMING" is everything. I have found so many scriptures that speak to this crazy idea of waiting.

After two days he will revive us, on the third day he will restore us, that we may live in His presence. Hosea 6:2 The third day is depicted in the Bible over and over again as the "relief from stress"

There is a time for everything and a season for everything under the sun. Ecclesiastes 3:1 Gods Time

wait for the gift my Father promised. Acts 1:4 If we cannot wait on the Lord, we will not reach our destiny.

Yet those that wait for the Lord will gain new strength, they will mount up with wings like eagles, they will run and not get tired, they will walk and not become weary. Isaiah 40:31

For the revelation awaits an appointed time, it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it, it will certainly come and will not delay. Habakkuk 2:3 It will surely come if we wait.

For it is time to seek the Lord until He comes to rain righteousness on you. Hosea 10:12b

Wait for the Lord; be strong, and let your heart take courage; yes, wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:14 There is a power that comes with wisdom and wait.

Our soul waits for the Lord; He is our help and our shield. Psalm 33:20

I wait for you, O Lord, you will answer, O Lord my God. Psalm 38:15

I wait for the Lord, my soul does wait, and in His word do I hope. Psalm 130:5

For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed are all who wait for Him. Isaiah 30:18b

The Lord is my portion, therefore I will wait for him. Lamentations 3:24

But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently. Romans 8:25

Behold, I waited for your words. I listened to your reasonings, while you pondered what to say. Job 32:11

Be still, and know that I am God. Psalm 46:10

So...... I think I'm getting the message that I'm supposed to wait on God. That I'm NOT supposed to take things into my own hands and rush through life. Slow down. Wait. My strength will come from waiting on the Lord. Wait.

A Sad Day

Its a sad day for me today. My baby girl moved out last night, which in itself is a tragic thing for me since I am majorly going through some empty next issues. But she moved out because she is mad at me and hasn't talked to me in 5 days except to yell at me to get out. I realize that everyone's reality is their own and what I may think about the situation is not at all how she feels, but I can't help but think and worry that its just not worth getting that mad at someone over something that in the big scheme of things just really isn't that important. Now I will say, that I'm not really sure what she's entirely upset about, but if it is only what she's letting on, then its really not that important. I have seen too many times in the recent past that a life can be changed or be gone in the blink of an eye. Do you really want to waste your time and energy being mad at someone that you're supposed to love.
I'm just sad, really really sad. And I don't know what to do. Normally its best just to let her get over it, then you can talk to her. But there doesn't seem to be any move toward getting over it. I'm torn between leaving her alone to get over it and begging and crying for her to forgive whatever I've done and come home. I have missed out on so much with her already with her living with her dad for several years, but I really miss her now. I can't help but think that I've failed her, I didn't somehow give her what she needed, I didn't love her enough or at least didn't make sure that she knew I did. I just don't even know. I'm just sad.

Has it really been almost 4 months since I posted something? Wow. I have been a little distracted lately and having the holidays mixed in with that didn't help. I have been working on a new Scraproom since the first of the year and am hopefully gonna finish it this weekend.
I have to admit that I am in the process of trying a new blog site because its supposed to be easier. I have not found that to be true, but then again I was a little short handed when it came to the electronic gene. I have another 8 day trial with it, but have a feeling I will give it up. If I keep this one (which I probably will) I will be changing the direction a little since I am in the process of trying to change the direction of my life. We'll see.

My Mom - my inspiration

This is my mom and my inspiration. She has the most beautiful heart and is the strongest person I know in the whole world. She was diagnosed with multiple myeloma in 1999 and given 18 months to live. Well, that didn't fit into her schedule, so she set out to prove them all wrong. After chemo that would kill a horse and 2 back to back stem cell transplants, she has been in remission for 9 years. She was told that she would have to be on maintenance chemo for the rest of her life, but at her last checkup 6 months ago, the doctor decided to give her body a break and take her off the meds. Bad idea. She is at this moment in Little Rock for her check up and is out of remission and undergoing some additional testing to determine the route to take now. They also found some suspicious spots and are thinking she may also have colon cancer. She's a tough lady, a true fighter (and a little hard-headed) and that along with her faith in God is how she's gotten as far as she has.
Although I know she can't live forever, I just can't imagine my life without her. She has been my rock through all sorts of things - divorce, raising 4 kids on my own, dealing with teenagers and the list still continues. I love her so much. Keep fighting, mom, and we'll keep praying.

Unexpected surprise!!! A Day Off!! I'm so excited because I really don't like working Fridays. Now I realize that most of the world work on Fridays or at least a five day work week. But I work long hours and usually put in over 40 hours in just 4 days. So having Friday off is a much needed thing. SO... I need to make a list or nothing will get done. Housework first then hopefully some scrapbooking.

Life has been hectic both at work and home. Trying to get a new software system up and running has been a long, arduous process. Not much frustration with it - just ALOT of work. At home its just constant running. Everyone going in different directions and absolutely NO FAMILY TIME in a long time. As much as I love watching football, it consumes our life beginning in the summer because we have one playing high school football. My husband just laughs because he knows I just don't "get it" but I don't understand why the coaches make the kids eat and breathe football. Our head coach is, quite frankly, excessively unfair and sometimes mean. My son chose to attend a week long Christian Youth Conference during summer practice and had to endure the punishment and ridicule of missing practice when he got back. All this from a coach that "preaches" God, Family, School, Football. No, I don't understand that.

There's so much more going on..... but I must get started on my list so I can scrapbook later.

I didn't realize that its been almost a month since I've posted something. Life has been a little hectic lately. Everyone is finally back in school. 2 in high school and 4 in college (including hubby). I'm the only one not in school.... just trying to get everyone to do their homework.

Work has been busy and a little.... not quite sure what the best word is... disappointing? maybe? I work with a great bunch of people but lately there has been an issue with a particular girl that I have actually known and worked with for 12 years. She has been extremely nosy about every little aspect of my life and quite frankly, its getting on my nerves. I love her to death, but when she is opening up folded pieces of paper on my desk and reading them its a little annoying. I'm beginning to have a really bad attitude about the whole thing and that really bothers me. I'm searching for the answers to handle it the way God wants me to. I don't say anything ugly or anything.... its just my daily attitude. I know she is having some financial issues and has had some bad luck but also made some bad decisions in that area, so I'm trying to be understanding but its hard. My hubby says she's just jealous - maybe, but there's no reason to be. But I'm praying really hard every day - all day sometimes - to work on my stinky attitude.